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  #1  
Unread 01-12-2013, 01:25 PM
Black Book
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)
Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
Exclamation Poetic Justice Tournament • Round Two

Poetic Justice Tournament

This is the first ever LetsBeef Poetic Justice Tournament. LetsBeef has never seen anything of this kind before. It is a strictly poetry tournament. Each round a different form of poetry will be chosen. The contestants will go head to head with each other in a single elimination style tournament. Each battle will have a set topic each contestant will write their poem on. These battles will be held in the TEXT CYPHER SECTION. The winner of each battle will be chosen by our prestigious JUDGE PANEL composed of 5 highly regarded member of LetsBeef.com!


The Judge Panel
Judge #1: @Askari
Judge #2: @Dissizit
Judge #3: @GRizzEAT
Judge #4: @AfterThought
Judge #5: @Verity

The judges will fairly vote on each battle. They will decide who they thought made the best poem overall. The voting is best out of 5, and if someone receives the first 3 votes, it is a 3-0 KO! If a judge is missing and can't vote on a battle that needs a vote to close, I will step in UNLESS it is my own battle.


Round One's Form of Poetry: ALLEGORY

An Allegory is a narrative having a second meaning beneath the surface one - a story with two meanings, a literal meaning and a symbolic meaning. As a literary device, an allegory in its most general sense is an extended metaphor. An Allegory does not have to rhyme, but it often does. An ABAB or AABB pattern is commonly seen in them. There is no set line/length of an Allegory either.


ALLEGORY EXAMPLE

Who rides so late where winds blow wild?
It is the father grasping his child;
He holds the boy embraced in his arm
He clasps him snugly, he keeps him warm.


"My son, why cover your face in such fear?"
"O don't you see the ErlKing near?
The ErlKing with his crown and train!"
"My son, the mist is on the plain."


"Sweet lad, o come and join me, do!
Such pretty games I'll play with you;
On the shore gay flowers their colors unfold
My mother has made you a garment of gold."


"My father, my father, o can you not hear
The promise the ErlKing breathes in my ear?"
"Be calm, stay calm my child, lie low
In withered leaves the night winds blow."


"Will you, sweet lad, come along with me?
My daughters shall care for you tenderly;
In the night my daughters their revelry keep,
They'll rock you and dance you and sing you to sleep."


"My father, my father, o can you not trace
The ErlKing's daughters in that gloomy place?"
"My son, my son, I see it clear
How grey the ancient willows appear."


"I love you, your comeliness charms me, my boy
And if you're not willing, then force I'll employ!"
"Now father, o father, he's seizing my arm
The ErlKing has done me the cruelest harm!"


The father shudders, his ride is wild
In his arms he's holding the shivering child
He reaches home with toil and dread.
In his arms, the child was dead.

The Allegory above has a literal and metaphorical meaning. One interpretation of it is that it is a metaphor for death.


Your Piece

You must use the topic you are given to create an Allegory that has a literal and metaphorical meaning. You will have 64 lines in a text cypher box, and can use as many as you like. Rhyming is optional, but it usually helps these flow better. At the end of your piece, either in the box or in the comments, you will explain the metaphorical meaning of the poem. This is for the judge's benefit in case it is difficult to see the deeper meaning.



What You Will Be Judged On

@Askari, @Dissizit, @GRizzEAT, @AfterThought, & @Verity will judge you on:
1. How Well the Metaphorical Meaning Matches Up with the Literal Meaning.
2. The Cleverness/Originality of Your Metaphorical Meaning.
3. How Good/Entertaining of a Story Your Literal Meaning Is.
4. How Fluent Your Allegory Can Be Read aka the Flow of It.



Bracket


Match Ups & Topics

LEFT SENDS and RIGHT RECEIVES

@UhMAZING WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @ViTRiOLA Ship on Land
@Unyqe(SENT) vs. @Jimmy Dean™When a Worm Ate the Bird
@KasperX(SENT) vs. @Streetz Da HoodThe Psychic's Crystal Ball
@The Black Book WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @EnfiniteFraternal Twins
@JamJar(SENT) WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @Prospect-JSSaint Peter's Tears
@Obey™(SENT) vs. @InZane123Green, Yellow, and Red Wires
@J-Swigz WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @John DosA Blind Pilot
(Mind Fuck vs. Anarchist)Driving On Empty



Senders: You will send your poem in a PRIVATE TEXT CYPHER. You will add only your opponent to the cypher. For this round, 64 LINE BOXES will be used. Once you send, post the link to the cypher in this thread. Please title your cypher this way: "*topic you have* (Round 2)".
Receivers: You will join the cypher sent to you and post your poem in the text box. Once you have replied, post the link in this thread saying so.
Judges: You will go to the cyphers and say who you thought made a better poem and why.


Senders MUST Send by January 17th at 11:59 EST.
Receivers MUST Reply by Janaury 19th at 11:59 EST.



Prizes
For 1st Place: The winner of the tournament will receive three emcee items provided by @AfterThought and a custom sig championship belt provided by @Swift.
For 2nd Place: The runner up will receive 1 emcee item.


DO NOT NO-SHOW AND GOOD LUCK! ANY QUESTIONS? POST THEM IN THIS THREAD OR PM ME!

Last edited by Black Book; 01-22-2013 at 05:16 PM.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 01:25 PM   #1
 
Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Voted: 0 audio / 529 text
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)


Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Exclamation Poetic Justice Tournament • Round Two

Poetic Justice Tournament

This is the first ever LetsBeef Poetic Justice Tournament. LetsBeef has never seen anything of this kind before. It is a strictly poetry tournament. Each round a different form of poetry will be chosen. The contestants will go head to head with each other in a single elimination style tournament. Each battle will have a set topic each contestant will write their poem on. These battles will be held in the TEXT CYPHER SECTION. The winner of each battle will be chosen by our prestigious JUDGE PANEL composed of 5 highly regarded member of LetsBeef.com!


The Judge Panel
Judge #1: @Askari
Judge #2: @Dissizit
Judge #3: @GRizzEAT
Judge #4: @AfterThought
Judge #5: @Verity

The judges will fairly vote on each battle. They will decide who they thought made the best poem overall. The voting is best out of 5, and if someone receives the first 3 votes, it is a 3-0 KO! If a judge is missing and can't vote on a battle that needs a vote to close, I will step in UNLESS it is my own battle.


Round One's Form of Poetry: ALLEGORY

An Allegory is a narrative having a second meaning beneath the surface one - a story with two meanings, a literal meaning and a symbolic meaning. As a literary device, an allegory in its most general sense is an extended metaphor. An Allegory does not have to rhyme, but it often does. An ABAB or AABB pattern is commonly seen in them. There is no set line/length of an Allegory either.


ALLEGORY EXAMPLE

Who rides so late where winds blow wild?
It is the father grasping his child;
He holds the boy embraced in his arm
He clasps him snugly, he keeps him warm.


"My son, why cover your face in such fear?"
"O don't you see the ErlKing near?
The ErlKing with his crown and train!"
"My son, the mist is on the plain."


"Sweet lad, o come and join me, do!
Such pretty games I'll play with you;
On the shore gay flowers their colors unfold
My mother has made you a garment of gold."


"My father, my father, o can you not hear
The promise the ErlKing breathes in my ear?"
"Be calm, stay calm my child, lie low
In withered leaves the night winds blow."


"Will you, sweet lad, come along with me?
My daughters shall care for you tenderly;
In the night my daughters their revelry keep,
They'll rock you and dance you and sing you to sleep."


"My father, my father, o can you not trace
The ErlKing's daughters in that gloomy place?"
"My son, my son, I see it clear
How grey the ancient willows appear."


"I love you, your comeliness charms me, my boy
And if you're not willing, then force I'll employ!"
"Now father, o father, he's seizing my arm
The ErlKing has done me the cruelest harm!"


The father shudders, his ride is wild
In his arms he's holding the shivering child
He reaches home with toil and dread.
In his arms, the child was dead.

The Allegory above has a literal and metaphorical meaning. One interpretation of it is that it is a metaphor for death.


Your Piece

You must use the topic you are given to create an Allegory that has a literal and metaphorical meaning. You will have 64 lines in a text cypher box, and can use as many as you like. Rhyming is optional, but it usually helps these flow better. At the end of your piece, either in the box or in the comments, you will explain the metaphorical meaning of the poem. This is for the judge's benefit in case it is difficult to see the deeper meaning.



What You Will Be Judged On

@Askari, @Dissizit, @GRizzEAT, @AfterThought, & @Verity will judge you on:
1. How Well the Metaphorical Meaning Matches Up with the Literal Meaning.
2. The Cleverness/Originality of Your Metaphorical Meaning.
3. How Good/Entertaining of a Story Your Literal Meaning Is.
4. How Fluent Your Allegory Can Be Read aka the Flow of It.



Bracket


Match Ups & Topics

LEFT SENDS and RIGHT RECEIVES

@UhMAZING WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @ViTRiOLA Ship on Land
@Unyqe(SENT) vs. @Jimmy Dean™When a Worm Ate the Bird
@KasperX(SENT) vs. @Streetz Da HoodThe Psychic's Crystal Ball
@The Black Book WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @EnfiniteFraternal Twins
@JamJar(SENT) WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @Prospect-JSSaint Peter's Tears
@Obey™(SENT) vs. @InZane123Green, Yellow, and Red Wires
@J-Swigz WINS DUE TO NO-SHOW FROM @John DosA Blind Pilot
(Mind Fuck vs. Anarchist)Driving On Empty



Senders: You will send your poem in a PRIVATE TEXT CYPHER. You will add only your opponent to the cypher. For this round, 64 LINE BOXES will be used. Once you send, post the link to the cypher in this thread. Please title your cypher this way: "*topic you have* (Round 2)".
Receivers: You will join the cypher sent to you and post your poem in the text box. Once you have replied, post the link in this thread saying so.
Judges: You will go to the cyphers and say who you thought made a better poem and why.


Senders MUST Send by January 17th at 11:59 EST.
Receivers MUST Reply by Janaury 19th at 11:59 EST.



Prizes
For 1st Place: The winner of the tournament will receive three emcee items provided by @AfterThought and a custom sig championship belt provided by @Swift.
For 2nd Place: The runner up will receive 1 emcee item.


DO NOT NO-SHOW AND GOOD LUCK! ANY QUESTIONS? POST THEM IN THIS THREAD OR PM ME!

Last edited by Black Book; 01-22-2013 at 05:16 PM.
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  #2  
Unread 01-12-2013, 01:37 PM
RakishHeir
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
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ugh, awesome :/ lol time to get to work
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Unread 01-12-2013, 01:37 PM   #2
 
RakishHeir
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
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ugh, awesome :/ lol time to get to work
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  #3  
Unread 01-12-2013, 07:08 PM
Jam Jar
Join Date: Oct 2012
Posts: 103
Mentioned: 101 Post(s)
Tagged: 2 Thread(s)
Estimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
1 Won / 1 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
68 Won / 42 Lost
Default

I'll commit an allegory to this but I doubt I'll get a response from Prospect as he not been on for like a fortnight and said he was quitting. I'll do a big dirty allegory nonetheless but you all better look at it and validate me with praise.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 07:08 PM   #3
 
Jam Jar
Estimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 6.72/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
1 Won / 1 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.72/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 6.81/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
68 Won / 42 Lost
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 287 text
Posts: 103
Mentioned: 101 Post(s)
Tagged: 2 Thread(s)


Default

I'll commit an allegory to this but I doubt I'll get a response from Prospect as he not been on for like a fortnight and said he was quitting. I'll do a big dirty allegory nonetheless but you all better look at it and validate me with praise.
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  #4  
Unread 01-12-2013, 07:15 PM
Black Book
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)
Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
Default

Lol. I'll hit you with feed on it for sure.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 07:15 PM   #4
 
Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Voted: 0 audio / 529 text
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)


Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Default

Lol. I'll hit you with feed on it for sure.
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  #5  
Unread 01-12-2013, 09:57 PM
Mind Fuck
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 3,535
Mentioned: 746 Post(s)
Tagged: 29 Thread(s)
Send a message via Skype™ to Mind Fuck
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
19 Won / 11 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.84/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.84/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
342 Won / 112 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
5 Won / 2 Lost
Default

@BLACK BOOK

well organized and thought out, explained with coherency and an essence of simplicity that all should understand

#doingyourthing

__________________

the kidz

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Unread 01-12-2013, 09:57 PM   #5
 
Mind Fuck
Estimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Audio: 7.33/10 stars
Ranked Audio Record
19 Won / 11 Lost
Estimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.33/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.84/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.84/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
342 Won / 112 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
5 Won / 2 Lost
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Voted: 35 audio / 1302 text
Posts: 3,535
Mentioned: 746 Post(s)
Tagged: 29 Thread(s)


Send a message via Skype™ to Mind Fuck
Default

@BLACK BOOK

well organized and thought out, explained with coherency and an essence of simplicity that all should understand

#doingyourthing

__________________

the kidz

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  #6  
Unread 01-12-2013, 10:03 PM
Black Book
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)
Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mind Fuck View Post
@BLACK BOOK

well organized and thought out, explained with coherency and an essence of simplicity that all should understand

#doingyourthing

Thanks fam. Just doing my best.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 10:03 PM   #6
 
Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Voted: 0 audio / 529 text
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)


Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mind Fuck View Post
@BLACK BOOK

well organized and thought out, explained with coherency and an essence of simplicity that all should understand

#doingyourthing

Thanks fam. Just doing my best.
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  #7  
Unread 01-12-2013, 10:30 PM
RakishHeir
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

@The Black Book

feed my haiku? lol
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Unread 01-12-2013, 10:30 PM   #7
 
RakishHeir
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
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@The Black Book

feed my haiku? lol
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  #8  
Unread 01-12-2013, 10:34 PM
Black Book
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)
Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
Default

Link me to it.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 10:34 PM   #8
 
Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Voted: 0 audio / 529 text
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)


Send a message via MSN to Black Book
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Link me to it.
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  #9  
Unread 01-12-2013, 10:48 PM
RakishHeir
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Posts: 437
Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
Default

http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/showt...126086&page=11

appreciate it brotha, wasn't even sure if I did it effectively to be honest but I sure did try.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 10:48 PM   #9
 
RakishHeir
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Join Date: Dec 2012
Voted: 0 audio / 0 text
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Mentioned: 21 Post(s)
Tagged: 3 Thread(s)
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http://www.letsbeef.com/forums/showt...126086&page=11

appreciate it brotha, wasn't even sure if I did it effectively to be honest but I sure did try.
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  #10  
Unread 01-12-2013, 10:59 PM
Black Book
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 5,432
Mentioned: 963 Post(s)
Tagged: 33 Thread(s)
Send a message via MSN to Black Book
Estimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 0/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 starsEstimated Skill in Text: 7.8/10 stars
Ranked Text Record
145 Won / 55 Lost
Exclusive Text Record
6 Won / 3 Lost
Default

"beautiful world void
travelling to her cold depths
to come as infant"

Overall, it's a decent piece. You could have upped the vocab a little and added a bit more imagery. But it's not too shabby.
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Unread 01-12-2013, 10:59 PM   #10
 
Black Book
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Join Date: Oct 2010
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"beautiful world void
travelling to her cold depths
to come as infant"

Overall, it's a decent piece. You could have upped the vocab a little and added a bit more imagery. But it's not too shabby.
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